Can you hear the rumbling, people? It may have seemed distant before, but it is creeping closer and closer for every day. Bad omens in the sky. Seals being broken one by one.

And on the crumbling tarmac on top of the ZwiftPower bunker an armada of belligerent racers roll in, complaining over massive cheating in Off the MAAP Tour and elsewhere, riders racing fair attacking cheaters in the race chat.

Let’s face it, the W/kg categories are falling apart. This is not the end of the beginning. This is the beginning of the end. The End of Days, the Untergang.

And from the ashes a Phoenix will rise.

Tagged : General

Hello fellow Zwifters!

Let us get properly introduced. I am Zwiftcruiser, your average Zwift cruiser. I live in Sweden. I like to ride my bike and to eat icecream. I like the color blue. Red is OK too.

What is a cruiser exactly? A cruiser is a special form of cheater in Zwift races. Does that mean that I am a cheater? Yes, it does! And you should be one too!

There are many ways to cheat in Zwift, but I will consistently use one single method alone to cheat indiscriminately in order to get podium placings. I do so supported by Zwift race rules and ZwiftPower race rules.

As you see me line up next to you at the warmup before a race, I am out to steal your legitimate win and will try my best to do so. I saved a hammer just for you!

Why do I cheat? What is my motivation? You are going to have to figure that out yourself here on the blog. Or create your own hypothetical explanation. In a sense, it really doesn’t matter anyway. The only thing that matters is that I still can cheat, and Zwift says there is absolutely nothing you can do about it. I’m not so sure about that though.

Tagged : General